Grocery store

I have never spent so much time in the grocery store as I did yesterday, OMG!  I was trying to think of what I could bring to work to eat, things that were easy, but the kind of food I could eat.  Did you know that the first thing you see when you walk into a grocery store is cookies and cakes, the FIRST thing!  I never noticed it until yesterday.  Then directly behind that is the produce section.  No wonder America is so damn fat!  So produce, ok here is the dilemma, I don't want to go to the store a million tims a week, so I was thinking of stocking up, but then I didn't want something to go bad before I could eat it or cook it for that matter.  So I got 2 nectarines, 2 peaches, they get soft and should be easy to eat. I got one plum and one apple, both not sure how easy they will go down.  I got a zucchini and squash, going to make some sort of casserole with ricotta and spaghetti sauce.  On head of cauliflower to make curried cauliflower, since it is so tasty and yummy.  Ok got past the bread aisle, whew!  I did go down the cookie aisle, I got one package of sugar free lemon cookies, for when I can't get past that urge.  I also got some low cal graham crackers, which I put sugar free cool whip in between, and froze those, they are yummy and low cal!  Then of course the pineapple and cottage cheese.  I got a thing  of the laughing cow cheese wedges, low fat triscuits, stuff I could eat and take to work.  I think all in all I did a good job at the grocery store, pretty proud of myself!
Off to my first day of work after two weeks, VERY nervous!

Never have I ever..........

in my adult life had bathroom scales!  I never have.  Growing up I really don't remember having scales in our bathroom.  Not sure why.  I always thought scales only went up to like 250 pounds.  Oh you know when you go to someone's house and they have scales, I would always step on them, and i would either get ERROR or the the dial would just keep spinning.  Someone told me recently that scales now go to 400 pounds and beyond, I thought it was time to get some scales.  A friend of mine kept bugging me to get them, and yesterday I finally did.  To them it was no big deal to pick some out, bring it home and step on it, but to me...........it was full on anxiety.  Would these really weigh me, after all these years I could really step on a scale, oh no, I can't do it..............I was actually scared of the thing.  Well he took them out, and they won't weigh you if it is on carpet, had to be on a hard surface, he took them to the kitchen, sat them on the floor, and he stood on them and weighed, yep he thought they seemed accurate.  He said now it is YOUR TURN.  I started breathing very heavily........maybe I even sweated a little bit, and well, I stepped on them.  Sure enough I had lost three pounds since my doctors visit!  Yes I know that I need to make sure they are weighing accurately and hopefully the same as the doc.  But still yet, it was a small victory that I needed to see, those three little numbers were music to my ears.  They are now in my bathroom upstairs, I haven't attempted to get on them again, don't really see the need, I don't want to become obsessed, but they are always in the back of my mind, I see them everytime I come in the bathroom.  I might weigh in the morning before work!  Wish me luck!

I ATE IT!

I have never been a fan of cottage cheese, ever!  But protein is very very important in my diet right now, and since cottage cheese has 13g for 1/2 a cup, I need to learn to like it.  Growing up I saw my Aunt Janice eating cottage cheese and pineapple all the time, as if it were actually GOOD!  So when I think of cottage cheese, I think of her and how she ate it.  So I went grocery shopping yesterday, which is a diff blog post, and got some fat free cottage cheese and a can of pineapple, in it's natural juices, which still has a LOT of sugar.  This morning, after I took my million pills, I made a small bowl, hopefully 1/2 a cup of cottage cheese, and some pineapple.  The thing with is when I eat I have to eat slow and chew really well, which is VERY hard to do with something you aren't sure you aren't going to like, but you know you have to eat it, so you would rather eat it fast and get it down.  I am pretty sure I ate this way too fast and my belly will prob be hurting here in a bit, but I got it down.  I did chew the pineapple up really really well, but the cottage cheese, prob not as much.  I guess it is something I will have to get used to.  I need to google and see if there are any other recipes to get in a large amount of cottage cheese.

I got the shoes!

So yea I finally got some good tennis shoes!  I am ready to workout and do some cardio!  This next week should be interesting.  I am super low energy b/c I am not eating very much, so it is hard to get thru the day, but I am working on it.  So I got the shoes......now what?

The Doc

Had my post op appt yesterday.  Everything went well.  He asked me how much I was puking, and I said NONE, he couldn't believe I haven't puked.  I am down 17 pounds from surgery, so that is good, down almost 40 pounds since my first doc visit.  This liquid stuff is getting old though, I won't lie.  I have had a cracker here and there, last night I had some tuna and crackers, ate a bit too much, just made me really tired.  Tonight I had eggs.  I scrambled two eggs, so I would have some left over.
So today I have eaten an individual size applesauce, 3 triscuits, and I would say one scrambled egg with green salsa.  I feel full.  My doc said I need to start eating at the same time everyday, and to eat 4 times and no snacking in between.  But this is when I start eating regular food.  Oh and when I eat I can  drink up until the time I start eating, but then I can't eat an hour to and hour and a half after I eat. WOW that will be hard.  Right now I feel overwhelmed about what I will eat.  What I should buy. What has the most protein, it's a lot to take in.
I am ready to go back to work Monday.  Wednesday I can get in the pool.  Monday I start college, I have a night class Monday and Wednesday, that will throw a kink in my food schedule.
It is weird, as  much as I have tried to not make food the main focus of my life, it is now the only thing on my mind 24/7, ugh.  It's hard!

It was rough

This was a lot more rough than I thought it would be.  Monday I went in for surgery, was there at 8am and didn't get called until after 10, that sucked, just sitting there!  As I am looking at the pics I think how awful I look, but I have never thought I looked awful.
I spent two nights in the hospital which was necessary!  The worst part was the catheter and having to do the xray the next day.  I had to drink stuff then they had to do an xray to make sure the staples sealed properly, that was the worst part, I was puking and crying b/c I could barely stand up, it was bad.  Then mom and Joc kept trying to get me up, and everytime they did I would puke.
I am currently dealing with what to eat.  I have zero appetite.  If a food commercial comes on tv I change the channel.  I did pretty good with mom and Joc making bacon and eggs and such, smelled good but I didn't want to eat it.
I am home alone all weekend, makes me nervous.  My normal faire would be a six pack and some pizza or bread from Specs......this weekend will be sugar free popsicles and hopefully Emily will bring me some soup. OH JOY!
Here are a few pics from surgery time.

I am cheating....

Well not really, still a damn protein shake, but this is the Synthasix one that tastes so good!  This is what my breakfast consisted of, what is in this little white cup!